No Hesitations

Here we go...

I have finally let go of all the fears and hesitations and decided to just be true to myself. I have allowed myself to be vulnerable but I am not afraid anymore because to truly live, one has to let her guard down to truly experience what life has to offer.

I am overwhelmed by happiness now. I haven't been this happy in a very very long time. Everything I feel right now seem so new, raw and fresh. I feel things and I think things and I dont hesitate to share it and express it now. I cannot be mediocre anymore. Not for something this beautiful. Not for something that has made me feel happy and alive again.

I'll risk getting hurt again. I think its worth it. Thats how it seems now.

I dont know what life has in store for me...for us...but I am not letting my fears take over my life. I have decided to live life with no hesitations, finally.

Blown Away

Mind blowing, I tell you!

I think thats the perfect phrase to use right now for all the things happening in my life right now. I had no idea that I'd be caught in such a whirl and that I'd feel this overwhelmed in such a short short span of time.

Time. I have an issue with time. Think of me as old school. I always think that anything that happens to fast or in a very short span of time cannot be real. I could never understand how people can reach an understanding or feel for one another if they've only spent a short time with one another. Yet here I am now, overwhelmed and high after only a month. It cant be what I think it is yet. Too fast. But I'd like to believe that what we both have right now is real and true.

I havent made the big jump yet. I dont plan to do such anytime soon. I am taking my time. I am in no hurry to tie myself down to something that may not be what I'd like it to be yet. I thank God we both understand this. I guess what is essential right now is that we are both happy and we both enjoy what we have right now. Feelings may let you toss and turn all night but as long as you let your mind have its say, then I guess things will turn out well.

Overwhelmed

I am overwhelmed by the newness of things. I am overwhelmed by its freshness. It is so raw yet I feel that it is real. The simplicity of the situation draws feelings that have long been dead inside me.

Dear Bloggy 2

Again, i feel like writing, journal entry style...so bear with me.

Im at the office right now and how I wish that time would speed up. Im dying of extreme boredom and hunger. Its a Sunday and time is extremely slow (whats new?!). I want it to be 10pm already. Im excited. I just am. Ü

A lot of things have been happening to me for the past few weeks. New and exciting things. Things that have made me feel very happy again. But also things that have made me think hard about this new chapter in my life that is slowly unraveling. Life always has a knack for surprising you and it will always keep you guessing as you ride along its twists and turns. Im riding along already. Scared but definitely willing to take a chance.

All Boxed Up

Think of a box. Two things are inside the box. These two things fit perfectly inside. Not too tight and definitely not to loose either. Snug. Comfortable. Swak.

But outside, its a whole different ball game.

I want to stay inside the box forever...

Exchange of Thoughts

Text messaging has gone a long way. Who would have thought that I can find inspiration in the exchange of thoughts that Mako and I just had a few minutes ago via text messaging.

Mako and I are different. So very different yet our minds seem to be always in synch. We can talk about anything and everything. This time its about love. (Well... usually it is about love)

Now that we are at this point in our lives, we both have realized that love is not something that is magical. We finally got over the idea that we can experience the same kind of love that most of us see in television and in the movies. Yes, love can make your head spin and it can make your heart beat thrice in one thud but it can never promise you a happy and long lasting relationship. It can never stand on its own. It can never be just about love. The right kind of love entails respect, patience, perseverance and sacrifice.

You dont jump into a boat that you haven't inspected. Do just that and expect to drown. True love is the kind of love that uses not just the heart but most especially the head. And its not just for your own good but especially for the person whom you love too. No one wants the person that they love to be hurt too right?

Too much thinking is bad for your health

I've been feeling so exhausted for the past couple of weeks. Barely had had a decent sleep. Cant seem to make myself go to sleep. Every night, my head seems to just keep on churning and churning. Thinking, thinking, thinking. Curse you, brain! Too much thinking can restrict you from doing a lot of things! It can prevent you from just...living. Loosen up! But I cant seem to. Too scared, too allergic to risk.

One day at a time. One day at a time...

Kaibigan

Hindi basta basta nahahanap ang isang tunay na kaibigan. Ngayon ko napatunayan yan. Marami kang makikila, marami kang makakasama ngunit hindi lahat ay tunay kang matutunton. Karamihan sa kanila ay dumadaan lamang sa isang yugto ng iyong buhay. Sa pagtatapos ng yugto, kasama ring magtatapos ang inyong pagkakaibigan.

Ngunit mayroong ilan at piling tao na habambuhay na sasama sa iyong paglalakbay. Sa bawat pagpapalit ng araw, sa bawat paglipas ng gabi, sa simula at pagtatapos ng isang kabanata ng iyong buhay, kasama mo silang makikipaglaro’t makikipagbuno sa mga hamon nito. Matagal ko ng nakilala ang mga taong ito. Hanggang sa ngayon, sila ang humahawak sa aking kamay kapag madilim at masikip ang tatahakin kong daan. Sa inyo, maraming salamat. Mahal na mahal ko kayo.

Naguumapaw

Ganito pala ang pakiramdam kapag...para kang umaapaw. Para kang punong puno. Konti na lang, sasabog ka na. Hindi ko na matandaan yung ganitong pakiramdam. Matagal na panahon na ring hindi ko ito naranasan. Ganito pala ulit yun.

Kaya lang...sa una lang sya masaya. Laging sa una lang masaya.

Taking My Time

" When I fall in love I take my time
There's no need to hurry when I'm making up my mind
You can turn off the sun but I'm still gonna shine and I'll tell you why..."